The Story God Wrote For Me

First, I have to apologize for my lack of blogging the past month. Michael arrived in Niamey on December 17, 2010 and stayed until January 13, 2011. We had an awesome and amazing time together here and I was sad when he left. However, Michael & I both know that whatever God is asking us to do is so much better than what we could want for ourselves so we trust God completely and we have peace. During his time in Niger, Michael was able to minister with Kimberly and me at kids club. The children loved his singing and his guitar and have missed Michael and his guitar since he left Niger. We also did a lot of computer repair work and networking stuff at the school while he was here which has helped me out a lot. We were able to go and spend the night with the Stokes in a village. We had a translator to help speak to the people and I was blessed to have the opportunity to tell a Bible story to the children of the village. Michael was able to “try” some real village food and somehow he d...

So I'm kind of at an odd place in my life. The place between wow looked at God has done for me the past 6 months (as of tomorrow) and kind of this scared and anxious feeling about leaving in 3 months. Why? Because I'm scared when I go back to the States I will lose sight of all that I have learned, that I will get a full time job, pay off my bills, and be back in the "American Dream". I don't want the "American Dream" I want to be a missionary for the rest of my life and share the gospel to this lost and dying world. This last month has opened my eyes to a new step of my Christian walk. The trials got harder but the reward was awesome. During the middle of my sickness last month, I finally just wept before my Jesus, my trust, my hope, my deliver, my fortress, my rock and cried out with everything inside of me to show me what to do. I prayed for strength to continue doing HIS will for my life. The next day I felt a joy and peace deep down in my Spirit and...

  So like every night I’m lying in bed, thinking of what I’ve learned today and staring at the ceiling fan. But for some reason last night a thought popped in my head while staring at the ceiling fan. My life is like a ceiling fan – sometimes I turn on, sometimes I turn off, sometimes I go fast, sometimes I go slow, and sometimes I wobble back and forth. But just like the ceiling fan I’m connect to something solid and non-moving. Jesus – he keeps me from spinning out of control and crashing to the ground. The rod from the ceiling is like the Holy Spirit that keeps me in line and keeps me grounded to the rock of my Salvation. I love it when random earthly things show me more meaning in the spiritual sense. God is awesome J So right now my husband is on his way to ATL to the airport. It is an extremely exciting moment for me because I get to see him for the first time in 6 months! I can't believe its been that long already. I started school back today and did a half day. It...

November 23, 2010 The girl scowled and looked around the room. She didn’t know why she was here it wasn’t her fault. This was just stupid and a waste of time. Some people just think they can blame something on her and think they have power over her…pathetic people. She looked up at the man next to her – her lawyer...ha ha ha…he didn’t do anything and sure wasn’t helping her at all. He just seemed to make matters worse. She looked across the room at the prosecutor. He just glared at her and then had the nerve to wave at her. Looking behind her, she saw her family crying and staring back at her with pleading wounded eyes. Pathetic she thought. They don’t understand me and just judge me. I have to take care of myself this isn’t my fault. She couldn’t trust anybody but herself and her friends that were there for her. A small voice inside her head said, “Where are they now?” …she huffed what a stupid thought - they were waiting for her to get back to the house that is why they weren’t he...

November 22, 2010 I am going to be ok. I just know it. This is just a trial and I am going to get through it by the grace of God. He is my Savior, my healer, my salvation, my Redeemer, my Abba Father, my Jehovah- Jireh, my strength, he is my GOD! I keep remembering the old wizard on Lord of the Rings when he is clothed in white and has his rod and he says to the fiery dragon, “You shall not pass”. I feel like this, I am fighting the forces of darkness right now. This is not just a disease this is spiritual warfare. The devil does not want me to be in Niger he has repeatedly shown that in my dreams, and sickness. He has tried to make me go for my fleshy wants and needs (go and run home). How do I know this? I prayed God would show me the way to go and allow me to hear his voice. I had a dream. In this dream - I am surrounded by men, who are dressed in black from head to toe. They are all wearing sunglasses. They are all possessed by the devil. I am alone in the midst of them and tryi...

My life is at a crossroads. The past week I have had to shift through many different emotions. Last Monday after being sick for 4 days, I went to the lab and had two vials of blood drawn to check for malaria and a CBC performed. Everything came back normal but I have the same symptoms of Malaria that I had the first two times. After speaking with my supervisors, my doctor, and another doctor, we can to the conclusion that it was possible that I had the malaria that hides out in my liver. I also found out that I could take primiquine to treat this but that is was not available here in Niger. It was very frustrating to know that a $20.00 drug could be found in the US where no malaria is located rarely but not found in a place where malaria kills people every day. Crazy, yes? Anyways I spoke and prayed to my husband and he had churches in Andalusia pray that God would show me away to go. I went Friday and had three more vials of blood taken and test performed for liver enzymes and a G6-PD...

Today has been a hard day. I've been sick again since last Wednesday. It has been a very discouraging time for me because I've been sick with malaria since August off and on. I am beginning to think I have the malaria that hides in my liver and this is why I can't get better. My supervisor Cindy had this type of malaria and she is now in the States getting treatment for it. The only thing if I do have this type of malaria - Niger doesn't have the treatment it. I would have to go back to the States, get liver lab work done, and monitored and be on treatment there for about 2-3 weeks. Yeahhh.......so right now I'm at a place in my life where I'm asking for prayer and for God to reveal what I need to do. I have two options: I have to let go of my pride and admit that God may be getting ready to send me back to the States. Second,  This may be another trial and I need to trust God and wait it out. Pray God's will for my life and not my own!